In my almost 46 years on this planet, I think I have finally found peace.
My life has changed quite significantly in the last 35 days and I feel really good. Step 1 was completely giving up all alcohol – yes beer! I know I know – I run for beer has been replaced with ” I run for the Feels”
You see I needed focus in my life and I just didn’t have it. I was injured in the fall and had to be immobilized for 8 weeks and I hated it. I decided that I had to figure this out. What makes me happy. Running does!
But!!!! I also figured out that I absolutely Do Not need to be better than anyone but the person I was before. I was that person who always compared myself to others “they are faster, they run farther, they are better” than me. Social media is a very strange place in that you can go there to find motivation and inspiration OR it can completely bring you down when you play the comparison game.
After my injury, which I’m still plagued with, I realized that I’m a solid 10 min slower than I was before on any pace goals. So guess what? I decided I no longer needed pace goals! I needed finishing goals. My one and only job is to cross that line, grab my medal and feel all the feels.
Another major decision I made was that I was not going to run any road races in 2016. Why? Mostly because I find them boring, there’s so many people and it hurts. My focus is now on conquering fears and distances the scare me. That happens in the ultra trail community.
When I am out on the trails I find myself. I experience many emotions out there, some good some not so good but nowhere else makes me think and dig deep into my soul.
Running in nature is so absolutely soul cleansing and when you have 10-24 hrs alone with your thoughts , things happen. I will conquer my first 50 miler this month at the Sulphur Springs trail race and I will not worry about my time or pace- I just want to finish. Then I’ll be satisfied.
I know that running is a ” to each his own” kind of sport which makes it even more awesome. Just remember to ” Do You” and don’t compare your end game to others. I will now always be a ” back of the pack” runner and that’s ok. I’m ok with that.
Run For the Feels because
Finishing is Winning!